Right Now

We are waiting oh so patiently for the kids to go to sleep so we can have a date at home. We're going to have dinner by ourselves and watch a movie and I'm sure it will be lovely.

What's even more lovely are the sounds coming from Elliot's room. No, he's not snoring......yet anyway. He is singing "scripture power....keeps me safe from sin". I love his little voice. I love how fast he learns things (especially when there is a song to teach with). I just love him :)

Now go to sleep Elliot :P

Thankful Thursday!

It's that time of the week (or decade, since it's been that long it seems) again. So pull on your thankful trousers and let's get down to business.....

1. Yummy smelling laundry detergent. Pretty lame, I know, but I really mean it. When we ran out of laundry detergent I decided to try something new. We bought some apple mango tango scented Gain (ooooooooh, fancy) and I'm telling you what....it is seriously like the commercials.

You know the ones. I'm sure you've seen them. There is one with one guy sniffing the other guy while they are celebrating a good play during some kind of a ball game. I know there are others but that's the one I can remember right off the top of my head. Seriously, it really does make laundry and and even just wearing clothes* a lot more enjoyable.

*disclaimer....I do not know, nor have I ever wandered around in the buff. Honestly I am one of the most modest people you will ever meet....I would wear clothes made out of tree bark if that's all there was just because I like to be covered up that. much.

2. I was taught about God and faith from a young age. This year has been a big struggle for me. One trial right after another. I know I'm not the only one so you must know what I'm talking about. But no matter how hard things have gotten, there is one thing that continually creeps into my mind....my faith. The knowledge that I have that there is an all knowing God, and He is my Heavenly Father. I am literally his daughter. And no matter how hard things get I can go to Him at ANY time.

In fact, one particularly hard day, I convinced myself that it would be easier to not feel the need to differentiate between right and wrong. To be able to just kind of float through life doing whatever I want. To not believe in God (gasp....blasphemous I know but it happened so there it is). So I tried it. I tried alllllllllll afternoon. And when I found myself about to pray to ask for help to not believe in God I realized it was hopeless. I'm a believer and always will be.

3. The Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship. Wow! That's almost all there is to say about that. But no need to fear, I've always been known for finding words when there are none to be found (or perhaps just when I shouldn't *blush*)

I recently decided to embark on a new project. I'm not quite ready to announce what that project is but suffice it to say I have also found myself doing some serious studying. Studying that will hopefully help with my project. In my studying I found my way to the Maxwell Institute (it is part of BYU and used to be known as FARMS as far as I know....but if I'm being honest back in the day my mom told me about such things I just found it boring and turned my brain off until she was done talking). But now....oh......hmmmm.......yeah, wow is pretty much all I can say about it. If ever you are wondering about something scriptural this is the place to go. Their mission statement says-

The Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship exists to:

• Describe and defend the Restoration through highest quality scholarship
• Provide critically edited, primary resources (ancient religious texts) to scholars and lay persons around the world
• Build bridges of understanding and goodwill to Muslim scholars by providing superior editions of primary texts
• Provide an anchor of faith in a sea of LDS Studies

Really super cool! Check it out sometime!

I could add some more, but I think I'll save some for next week.

Now it's your turn =)

It's Not Thursday Yet....

So I think I'm going to have a Whiny Wednesday moment here real quick.

I just tried to schedule an appointment at a local spa. BJ gave me a gift certificate for my birthday and I haven't had time to redeem it yet. No big deal, the thing doesn't expire for a whole year.

I just hopped on the computer to take one last look at the website to decide for sure what I wanted to do, but when I got to the page all it said was "this website is no longer active". Hmmmm, that's a little weird.

So I decided to just go ahead and call.....AND THE NUMBER HAS BEEN DISCONNECTED! I'm completely bummed.

I got an awesome gift for my birthday and never got to use it. Lame.

At least So You Think You Can Dance is on tonight.

Thankful Thursday

This week I am extremely thankful for BYU Education Week, for all of the people that have made the event possible, and for all of the people that have made it possible for me to go. My mom worked out a deal with my Aunt and my cousin that if they would watch my kids for two days so I could go to Education Week, she would treat them to the other two days. It has been just incredible. I feel all sorts of edified. I feel well fed, spiritually speaking. Heck, I just feel down right warm and fuzzy!

It is extremely difficult to listen to sacrament meeting(and therefore be spiritually uplifted) when you have two little ones crawling all over you asking for fruit snacks or crayons or why it's not okay to play with transformers at church. So it has been pure bliss to sit completely still and just listen. To have the spirit speak things to my mind and to my heart. To recognize some areas where I need to try a little harder but also to realize that I'm mostly doing OK. For the first time in a while I feel at peace. This is just what I needed.

Thanks Mom, Aunt Julie, Aubrey, and of course BJ for making this happen for me this week :)

Hello Friends.....Long time, no see!

Totally my own fault and I know it.

I promise to be better though.

There has been a lot going on over the past little while and I'm ashamed to say that I've spent a good deal of that time wallowing in my own self pity. But, NO MORE!

So get ready, blogosphere....you're going to be seeing a lot more of me ;)

One More Year with our Miracle :)

Well, that time of year has come again. Tomorrow is Elliot's birthday. This year I am just plain excited. That is a much different feeling than in years past. The day he was born I was scared. His first birthday something was just "off" (we were so happy he had come so far but there was some apprehension behind the celebrating). His second birthday I was dealing with morning sickness. His third birthday was starting to feel more normal, and this year is pure elation.

He has come so far and is doing so well. He is no longer a baby (,"I'm a big boy!) He is getting bigger all the time, and he is healthier than he has ever been. *Knock on wood*. He is truly a miracle!

This is one of the very first pictures ever taken of Elliot.

Back then I worried if he'd even make it through the night. It was painful to be away from him. He was so fragile and I knew he just needed his mommy and daddy. Eventually the fear of losing him subsided and instead I worried that he'd still be on oxygen during his senior prom.

He eventually outgrew that too. Then we worried if he'd make it through a winter without a hospital stay, or if he would need another surgery. But now we are fortunate enough to have different worries.

Like if he will hate me for the rest of his life for subjecting him to daily growth hormone injections. Or if he'll ever be fully potty trained (maybe he'll be wearing a pull-up to prom instead of that cannula, ha). Now we are able to worry if we are teaching him how to make correct decisions, or showing him often enough how much we love him.

I know that as a parent the worry never really goes away, but I am so grateful that we have come far enough to put our worry on the back burner for one day....because you better believe there will be nothing but celebrating tomorrow!

Thankful Thursday

Holy cow, it's been a long time since I've even opened blogger! It's high time I came back and shared a few things I'm thankful for :)

This week I'm thankful that...

I got Evie's Easter dress done on time....with some assistance from my mom. I was getting a little worried that I wasn't going to make it but we got it done just in time.

BJ bought a new cd drive for my computer today. This is really good news. I haven't posted in so long partly be cause my dumb computer can't read the discs with all our cute new pictures on them. But that will be changing on Monday, yay!

My good friend Jill posted this article on her blog a while ago really. I had been thinking about this for a while anyway, but when Jill posted the article on her blog it really made me think. This is the other reason I've haven't been posting as much. I've been trying really hard to wean myself off the internet. I also am not sure I would call my internet use an addiction, but I definitely have spent more time online than I would care to admit. At one point, with a very sick baby and some seriously messed up emotions, the internet and the friends I made there were my lifeline. But now I have a healthy, beautiful family. And these are the moments that I'm going to look back on and miss. My sweet little kids are growing up too fast, and I don't want to miss a single moment of it. Especially not because I was too busy worrying about what was happening on facebook or on someone's blog. I love you all, but it's time to readjust my priorities a little :)

We had a Playdate. Elliot's little friend Matty got to come over to play for a couple of hours today. It was SO fun to watch them interact and have such a fun time. The must have played with every single toy Elliot owns. And it took Elliot's focus off Evie for a while...I don't remember the last time the poor girl has gone two hours without being pinched or pushed. I'm sure she was grateful for Matty too!

What about you? What are you thankful for this week?

A Strange Request

While we were out to dinner last Saturday we were approached by a guy (probably in his early 20's) who had a really strange request for us. I was away from the table when it happened but was told all about it when I returned.

I guess the kid came over to the table and asked my mom if he could take a picture with her little boy. Elliot was sitting by my mom but she deferred the question to BJ, but they were both pretty confused by the request. I guess the kid could tell that BJ was confused so he told him that he just had to have a picture with Elliot because he looks JUST like the kid in Meet the Robinsons.


I can see it, what do you think? My mom has always said that Elliot looks like a cartoon character.....I guess she wasn't kidding :)

At least everyone seems to like his new glasses. I should add that we took the rectangular ones back and got him a different pair that are more round, they fit him better and look nicer too!

Thankful Thursday

This week I am thankful for.....

Hope. Life sure would be a lot harder if it weren't for hope. No matter how bad things get, there is always hope. And coupled with faith in Christ, hope can get us through anything.

My Beautiful Kids. No matter how frustrated this mommy gets during the day, I have two adorable kids that love me and give me good cuddles before bed. I wouldn't trade those hugs and kisses for anything.

My Talents. You know it's interesting, a lot of times I think that we're given talents to bless the lives of others. That is definitely true and I do feel it is important to use our talents to help others. But I also think that our individual talents were given as gifts to bless ourselves too. I don't know about you, but the things I consider my talents are things that I enjoy. So when I use them I may be blessing others but I'm also bring fulfillment and happiness into my own life.

What are you thankful for this week?

This is What Happens

When your 14-month old refuses to take a nap.....

How Do You Make a Cute Boy Even Cuter?

Put cute glasses on him!

We had the Neo-natal follow up clinic for Elliot today. We get to go at least once a year (usually more than that) and see a slew of medical professionals all in one spot. We see a pediatrician, a developmental psychiatrist, a speech therapist, nutritionist, physical and occupational therapists (if needed) and an awesome pediatric ophthalmologist.

We got to see the ophthalmologist first. Actually, he caught us before we even had a chance to sign in. He put some drops in Elliot's eyes and sent us back out to the waiting room. When we went back in about 20 minutes later, he asked me if we had any history of childhood eye problems in our family. Well BJ has worn glasses since he was a child, so I guess so. Then the Doctor told me that Elliot needed glasses.

It was funny because I've been thinking for a while that he might need glasses. For no reason in particular, it's just been in the back of my mind. So I wasn't really surprised. He gave us Elliot's prescription and sent us on our way. That was really the only thing that changed with today's clinic....everything else looks great. Yay!!

After Daddy finished work, we all headed to the mall. Even Magah, Papa, and Ashley. We picked out some glasses which was tough to do because they were all so big. Even the ones we picked were too big, but they were one of the smallest pairs and looked the best.

After dinner we went back to Lenscrafters to pick up his new glasses. I think he looks pretty cute! They are definitely going to take some getting used to but in the long run I think he'll be happy that he can see better now :)

New Adventures

Due to some extenuating circumstances in my extended family, we are (unfortunately) taking a break from the Preemie Tee making business. My mom needs to take a break and focus more of her attention on some family matters. I totally support her in this decision, but it was more than a little sad when we packaged up the last orders a few days ago. I have devoted so much of my time for the past three years to this business. It's meant so much to me to be able to "give back". To feel like I was repaying some of the blessings we were given while in the NICU, even in the smallest of ways. Of course I'll never be able to repay all the miracles that were performed on our behalf, but it was nice to think that we might have been making the NICU roller-coaster ride a little easier for someone else.

This isn't the end of Elliot's Preemie Tees. Just a break. At least that's what my mom says. I hope she's right.

Anyway, here I sit at a crossroad. I'm sad to be leaving my Preemie Tee making days behind (even temporarily) but I'm excited to try my hand at being a real stay at home mom. I think I did the stay at home thing for a couple of months. Elliot was still completely immobile when I started helping my mom though. And I'm beginning to realize how NOT stay at home I've been over the past three years. Even though I have called myself a stay at home mom, I think it would have been more accurate to call myself a working mom who just happened to have her kids with her all day too. I see now lots of ways that I've been distracted and lots of ways that my family has sacrificed for me to be able to help with the business. But that is all going to change.

In fact it started changing today. I made a weekly menu and did REAL grocery shopping for the first time in who knows how long. I about passed out when it came time to pay the cashier for the food even though it was far less that what we have been spending. Fast food is SO convenient, especially when you've been working all day. But it adds up really fast. Now I'll actually have time to cook real dinners, and save our family some money. Plus I have several closets that are just dying to be cleaned out. A quilt and some Christmas stockings to finish. Some redecorating to do. Places to explore. Playgroups to attend (at least I hope....they might not even have a playgroup around anymore) And a branch full of people I'm dying to get to know (after nearly four years of living here).

I'm a little scared too. Who knows if I'll be any good at any of this. I guess there's only one way to find out.